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I am learning to ride and just have my permit at the moment. My husband is totally ticked that I am not ready to go on long rides and am wanting to just cruise around our neighborhood. Do you have any words of wisdom to overcome my anxiety? Is it wise to hop on and go for a long ride?
First and foremost, stress to your husband that if you are going to ride, you are going to learn at your own pace - not his. Only you know how comfortable you are on the bike, and because of this only you have that innate sense of what you might be ready to tackle.
Keep in mind that for experienced riders, everything about the operation of the bike is already second-nature - they’ve probably forgotten what it’s like to have to learn the various aspects of riding the bike, observing traffic, and generally being safe - all while trying to get just a quick glimpse of that “freedom of the road” that everyone seems to be talking about. So just tell him you’re prepared to spend the time it takes to get good at riding, but it has to be at your own pace. Encourage him to go on solo rides or rides with experienced friends so he doesn’t feel like he’s completely dependent on your learner’s pace.
Having said all that, if you are comfortable on the bike riding around your neighborhood, it’s possible you are ready for a slightly longer ride and you’re just reluctant because you’re enjoying a little “plateau” in your comfort zone. I encourage you to venture a little farther out, but safely and in your own way.
So try this: get out a map and pick a destination about 30 miles from home that you really want to go to. Plan a ride with that destination as your half-way point - hopefully it will include some 45- and 55-mph roads to give you a sense of what faster speeds are like, without putting you on the 75-mph Interstate too soon. (For me personally, it’s important that I be the one planning the comfort-zone-expanding ride… it gives me a sense of ownership of the plan rather than feeling like someone’s trying to control me.) Just take that round trip once, to see how you like it. You might find you really are ready for a new challenge!
If you really don’t feel comfortable riding outside the neighborhood yet, by all means just keep at it and stress to your hubby that it’s important for you to feel you’ve mastered this step before you proceed to the next.
Anyone else want to take a stab at this one? Feel free to comment!
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July 27th, 2007 at 9:26 am
I can totally relate with you and bikerchick has some really good ideas. It took me a while to be able to go out on the open road but here is how I did it. I have had my liscense for almost a year. I would not go over 40 MPH. Last month some of my co-workers were going to Bike Night in Indianola. I wanted to go. But to get there I was going to have to go more than 40 MPH. I decided to go for it and see what happens. Well I loved it. I have since been looking for a bigger bike so that I can do more out of city riding. Well tomorrow I am stepping up from a 400cc to a 800cc. An idea may be to get together with some friends and to take a small ride. This way you have the support and if you decide that you don’t like the open road yet there will probably be someone that is willing to turn around with you and head back to the city.
July 27th, 2007 at 9:27 am
One more thing. If you are in the Des Moines area I would be willing to go with you.
July 27th, 2007 at 1:47 pm
WOOHOO!! Vicki, the gal who asked this question is in Illinois but you’ve offered another great idea for her to consider. THANK YOU for sharing your experience and for offering another suggestion, and congrats on achieving all those milestones yourself!
Are you going to East Village Bike Night tonight? What do you ride? I’d love to meet up and just say hello!
Best,
Janet (”Biker Chick”)
July 27th, 2007 at 6:54 pm
No I am not going to the East Village tonight. My son has been gone all week so we are spending time together tonight. I will let you know when I do go to a bike night so we can meet up. I currently have a Honda 400 Automatic but will be getting my Kawasaki Vulcan 800 Classic on Sunday. It is Red and the person that had it added lots of accessories. She is stepping up to bigger bike. I am hoping to redo my website and put pictures of it on my site.
July 31st, 2007 at 5:28 pm
I totally agree with what has been said…don’t let your husband push you past your comfort zone! If your husband won’t listen to you, is there a friend of his that rides, too, that you could maybe put bug in his ear and he could talk to your husband about it? Sometimes, they do relate better to someone other than their spouse.
Also if you can find some women bikers through a local club or dealership, I’m sure they would be more than willilng to go on a soft, easy ride with you. That would make you feel less stressed than riding with your husband and knowing he is wanting to push you.
This may sound like a stupid idea, but when I started riding, I’d get freaked out by looking at the speedometer and realizing I was going a heart-stopping 35 or 40 mph. Since I was following my husband at the time and trusted his judgement, I quite looking at the speedometer all the time. (Of course, not a good idea if you are on a solo ride!) Anyway, that way by the time I would finally look down at it, we’d been going whatever speed for a while and I wasn’t freaked out about it!
July 31st, 2007 at 8:22 pm
Blanche, great ideas, thanks for adding them here! ~ Janet
February 13th, 2008 at 9:45 pm
Janet– It’s Kristin from Porky’s. I found your blog and although motorcycles are cool, I don’t ride. I thought I’d tell you hello anyway! It’s neat that you do this. I have less than 50 pages left in the book you gave me. Thanks again, see you soon. Kristin : )
February 14th, 2008 at 7:23 am
Hi Kristin - glad you stopped by! You don’t have to ride to read the blog, it’s for anyone who’s interested for whatever reason, so stick around! I’m so glad you are enjoying the book. I really loved that book when I first read it - it has been a favorite for a long time. Another really good one is called “Writing Down the Bones” by Natalie Goldberg. It’s similar in that it’s very inspirational and helpful at the same time.
Thanks again for reading along here - I am really hoping for warmer weather SOON!
Take care -
Janet
Janet (Biker Chick)’s last blog post..Capitol City Customs Swap Meet & Bike Show